A Slightly Different Flava…

10 Aug

Have you thought about stopping writing the blog? If the blog was the reason for dating, what was the reason for the blog? Maybe blog about something else for a while?

Last week my Twitter bud Dan Austin ask me the questions above. After my most recent negative dating experience, I guess I’ve made it more than a little bit obvious that I’m not feeling too positive about dating right now.

Since my experience with East End Boy confirmed that I am stuck in a merry-go-round of being attracted to emotionally unavailable men, I can’t help wondering if there is any point in me dating. Rather than date guys for the sake of it, I think I need to take a step back and try figure out exactly why this pattern keeps occurring.

So, in answer to Dan’s questions above –  yes I have thought about stopping the blog. And yes, the blog was the reason for me pushing myself to date but the actual reason for my starting the blog was to have fun while getting myself back ‘out there’. The story goes…. I had given up on trying to find someone special and was living a happily single life, but through a work-related project I had the opportunity to speak with a dating expert and a life coach. The advice I received was helpful, but one thing that stuck in my mind was that I shouldn’t give up. I had to keep trying. I was reminded that when looking for a job, you don’t give up after the first rejection – you keep scouring job ads, you keep applying, you keep going for interviews and you stick at it – that was how I needed to approach dating. I was told that I had to be in it to win it. I was told that I should take the seriousness out of it and make it more fun. It was suggested that I should write a diary or even a blog. So hey, here I am.

Blogging - I love it. Cheers!

The amazing thing. It’s been more about taking the seriousness out of dating. It’s given me the opportunity to learn more about myself and to look at how I can make things better. It’s given me a chance to become a part of an online community. I’ve met and become friends with people that I never otherwise would’ve gotten to meet. Blogging has become quite a big part of my life, and I don’t want it to stop. However, I’ve been thinking about how can I continue to be a dating blogger but without actually doing the ‘dating’ part?

In true ‘I’m addicted to the online community’ style, I asked the question on my Facebook page. A lovely lady called Adrien Bowman replied, ” You are still single… and that includes more than dating” and you know what? She’s completely right! From now on, I’m a ‘single blogger’ and not just a ‘dating blogger’. There’s so much more to me than just dating, don’t ya know 😉

Therefore, the blog tagline has changed from ‘Dating in the beautiful city of London, it ain’t easy‘ to ‘Being single in the beautiful city of London, it ain’t easy‘. Still me, but with a slightly different flava…

15 Responses to “A Slightly Different Flava…”

  1. Dazediva August 10, 2011 at 1:16 PM #

    Good on ya babe … there’s more to you and this blog than just dating .. whilst I understand the reasons for starting the blog; you can see yourself that by blogging you have discovered other things about yourself, and gotten to know a whole new community that you can peer into 🙂

    At the end of the day – single or dating – this blog is about you =) and I can’t wait to see what other flavours you bring to the table !


    • TheSingleFilez August 13, 2011 at 11:04 PM #

      Thanks sweetie. The single life is about so much more than just dating, right? In the past, I’ve written about other stuff not specific to dates before. I’ve written about having Daddy issues and no close male friends, I’ve written about being stuck in the friend zone, I’ve written about solo holidays etc…. more of the above, I guess.

      Should be fun!

  2. Dan Austin August 10, 2011 at 1:50 PM #

    Yay – a brilliant solution! x

    • TheSingleFilez August 13, 2011 at 10:10 PM #

      Right? Blogging doesn’t have to stop just because my dating does…!

  3. Sparky August 10, 2011 at 2:19 PM #

    Glad you’re going to keep blogging!

  4. Amber Phresh August 10, 2011 at 4:37 PM #

    Love it! 🙂

  5. Nikki B August 10, 2011 at 6:39 PM #

    I agree with Miss Dazediva… there’s more to you than dating. Looking forward to hearing more! 😀

    • TheSingleFilez August 13, 2011 at 9:58 PM #

      It’s going to be more of a challenge to come up with new blogging topics, but I like a challenge 😉

  6. trininista August 10, 2011 at 6:57 PM #

    That’s what I’m saying. Single and Fabulous! wooot! woot!

  7. The Booby Prize August 11, 2011 at 12:33 AM #

    Yay! I’m so glad to hear this. I’ll look forward to more faabulous entries from you =)

  8. Arlene August 14, 2011 at 6:37 PM #

    Good for you! Looking forward to reading you single posts, as well.

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