Next Stop, Cougar Town!

26 Jun

I look young for my age but I don’t always see it as the wonderful thing everyone else thinks it is. I will appreciate my youthful looks when I’m 50 and I finally look 30, but for now I find it frustrating to have to constantly prove  myself to people; whether it’s the sales assistant at my local Tesco (who is usually younger than me) or the doorman at a nightclub, I am repeatedly having to whip out ID to prove that I am an adult.  Sometimes would be flattering but all of the time feels insulting. I often find myself wanting to scream “FOR PETE’S SAKE, I AM A GROWN-UP – WITH A MORTGAGE AND EVERYTHING!”.

Another downside is that I tend to attract younger men. I know it’s not necessarily a bad thing but considering the fact I’ve never experienced a long term relationship, there’s a chance this may not necessarily be a good thing either. I don’t often attract older men (which is why I was so excited about dating Older Guy last summer) and to prove this theory, the only guys who hit on me while I was in New York were guys who were at least ten years younger than me. When I mentioned on Twitter and on my Facebook page that I was asked out by a 25 year old cutie-pie, the responses went a little something like this…

Yay, Cougars!

“….and the problem is?”

“Nothing wrong with going after the pups.”

“I”ve dated up to 13 years older…so why discriminate against someone younger. Why discriminate against someone younger. If someone is lacking in the mental faculties their age will make little difference. Age doesn’t equate to maturity.”

“10 years is fine! Especially if he is cute ;)”

And cute he was. Cute enough for me to ask if he had any older brothers! I know of the “age ain’t nothing but a number” saying but in this particular case he was definitely too young for my tastes. Putting the fact that he was 25 aside, he was dancing around the shop he worked at in a showy-off kind of way (NYC’ers, get 2 pairs of Converse for only $75 at ‘Get Set’ on 8th Ave  & 34th St – bargain!),  and had that young boy look going on – big ol’ baseball hat, big ol’ baggy t-shirt and way too saggy jeans. I just can’t work with that.

On the flip side, the guy I came away from my ten nights in NYC feeling the most excited about was a friend of a friend who showed me that it’s more about who you are rather than about the number that is attached to you. He was only 24 but has a job that allows him to travel around the world (he was a Londoner in NYC for work) and we had things in common (background, music tastes). All evening it felt like we ‘vibed’ really well. I knew that we were sitting closer to eachother than we needed to. I liked feeling that he was stuck to my side. I enjoyed being more touchy-feely then we need to be. It felt like there was potential there and it was a nice feeling. It was the most flirty I had been in AGES and to top it off… it was with a 24 year old!!!

The moral of this story – I need to stop limiting myself. I realise that because of my looks, it’s more likely that my Mr Right is going to be younger than me. What I need to do is embrace it and be more open minded. If it works for Mariah, Demi and Madonna, I sure bloody can make it work for me.

Next stop, Cougar Town!


3 Responses to “Next Stop, Cougar Town!”

  1. Dazediva June 26, 2011 at 6:52 PM #

    Go Madame Cougar !! =P
    I’m only playing … age is really just a number .. I know 30+ guys (& gals) who act worse than some of the 24 year olds I know ..
    A girlfriend and me were having this discussion .. over the last 5 years, all the guys who seem to be coming our way are guys who are younger than us .. and I hit 30 in January … my cousin is married to a guy who is 6 years younger than her .. it’s more about how you can connect with someone … enjoy the ‘pups’ coming your way 😛

    • TheSingleFilez June 27, 2011 at 2:42 AM #

      I know, right? I’m quite a young (at heart) 34 year old… apart from dodgy knees, I still feel exactly the same as I did when I was 25. So hey, me hooking up with a 25 year isn’t completely wrong!

      Anyway… I totally look the same age as half of these young guys, so like you said, its all about how I connect with someone.

      I definitely plan to be more open minded going forwards…

  2. Little Miss Random June 29, 2011 at 11:36 AM #

    I went out with someone six years younger before… in fact, that was my last serious relationship and it didn’t end particularly well. After that, I swore off younger guys. Then I met someone five years younger and while we never went out, he was definitely someone I’d have loved to have pursued had the timing been right for both of us.

    I don’t think it’s got anything at all to do with the number now, but to do with their attitude and maturity, but, that being said, the number’s generally a good indication of that, so I still steer clear of the young ‘uns just so I don’t end up wasting my time… but that’s just me… and possibly to do with the fact that the young ‘uns tend to come up to me while I’m on the dance floor!

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