Technology: Encouraging Laziness In The Noughties

2 Mar

Last Saturday I did something I hadn’t done in months. I partied. I partied hard! I got my hair did, got dressed up and danced all night long. It was also the perfect opportunity to mingle. Yes, I know a club isn’t the best place to meet Mr Right but hey, it might be a good place to meet Mr Right now…right?  So I worked it out. Sexy LBD, four inch heels, freshly done hair and rocked my brand new MAC Viva Glam Cyndi lipglass. I was ready to GO! There were tasty men in abundance, but typically, the guy I ended up talking to was a friend of my friends.

He seemed funny enough and was a friend of my friends, so how bad could he be? A small alarm went off in my head when he asked for my BB pin but I managed to deflect the question and change the subject.  Closer to the end of the convo, he asked if we could keep in touch, I said sure but that I didn’t even know his name. Small alarm number two went off when he took my phone to input his number. When I reminded him that I still didn’t know his name, he said “YF”.  I didn’t quite hear, so asked him to repeat it. Get this, he’d actually saved his number in my phone under the name ‘YF – Your future‘. No seriously, he actually did. I thought it was cheesy, not at all as smooth as he seemed to think it was and that it came off as something he uses on all the laydeez. (**Sidenote: Fellas, this kinda cheesiness really isn’t impressing anyone. Just sayin’)

Anyway, I rolled my eyes, laughed it off and got back to dancing up a storm with  my girls. I crawled in at 5am and after a few hours sleep, woke up to a text sent at 5.44am “U get home safe babe send me ur pin“. I’m going to ignore the  spelling and (lack of) punctuation because it’s kinda nice he asked if I got home safe but, there he goes with the BB pin business again.

I was busy with a friend so didn’t get around to replying straight away. I got another text from him around 5pm, “Babe send me ur bb bab“. By now, any slight interest I had in  him has been totally squeezed out of me. Two missed calls  later (I didn’t answer, just because I didn’t want to). I sent a text saying “Sorry I’ve just seen your missed calls. I’ll give you a shout during the week, busy with friends right now. Catch ya later”. The cheeky bastard’s reply was  “I only asked 4 ur pin is tht so hard“.

All of this had me thinking, am I being SO unreasonable? Is it wrong that I wasn’t impressed all he wanted to do was get acquainted using BlackBerry Messenger? Am I too traditional/old school in wanting a guy to make the effort to get to know me by actually picking up the phone? Don’t get me wrong, I love BBM and I use it all of the time… with people I already know. Get to know me first. Show that you are capable of making an effort. It’s impersonal. It’s lazy.  It’s an excuse to not pick up the phone and call. Mind you, the fact he came off as being a sleazy a-hole probably didn’t help. Just sayin’.



14 Responses to “Technology: Encouraging Laziness In The Noughties”

  1. trininista March 2, 2011 at 11:17 AM #

    TO-TA-LLY A-GREE. I think with all the technology and phone packages, the personal touch is lost on some guys. I cannot tell you the last time I had a phone call with a man. 300 free texts per month = texting every second. I hate that. I am not a texter or a BBM-er, and I have stopped responding. A phone call cannot be that expensive. I don’t want to be one out of 1000 BBM pins for you. As I said, RUN. Guy sounds like an idiot.

    • TheSingleFilez March 5, 2011 at 12:00 PM #

      I agree! The more texts I received from him, the more my idiot warning sensor kept going off.

  2. IceQueen March 2, 2011 at 3:55 PM #

    I agree he sounds like a complete idiot any real man would want to talk to you on the phone and not be hounding you for your bb pin.

    • TheSingleFilez March 5, 2011 at 12:00 PM #

      “Hounding” being the key word. I wasn’t impressed!

  3. eyebrowsofdoom March 2, 2011 at 9:01 PM #

    Urgh get RID.

  4. John March 2, 2011 at 11:27 PM #

    Good evening… new to your blog and I’ve only recently discovered the whole bbbbbbbbbb thing! I’m afraid I still have a diary where ink is required and a mobile phone that just about takes a picture. I sometimes think, I must update myself but then essentially what communication boils down to is the phone, emails and face to face contact, so I never bother!

    Anyway, having read your blog I feel slightly reassured that the best way to communicate with someone is to actually present yourself as a person and not a bbbbbb thingamabob!

    So… to my point, you provided me with the encouragement I’ve been looking for! I’ve been single for near on two years now and have since then had the odd pleasant fumble and a short term relationship.
    I’m now at the point in my life where I’ve been through the grieving of a lost relationship, the indulgent pleasant selfishness of having my own place again, and now wanting to move on and share myself with someone I like!

    So there’s this woman I’ve had my eye on, and I think she might like me also (I’m not certain but I guess I won’t know till I take the risk and find out). Anyway, when I see her, she makes me smile and I like being in the same space as her! In fact, the weekend just gone I was giving my flat the once over and had some of my fav tunes playing and I couldn’t stop thinking about her!

    Now I’m no pollock… If I do approach this woman and find that she has no interest in me whatsoever, I’ll leave it at that, but right now, I want to go up to her in a composed manner and let her know that I really fancy her!

    I don’t think I would do it like that. I think I would try to start a conversation with her about something that’s worthy of a chat, and maybe in there somewhere ask her out for a drink!

    If my feelings are assured, then I really do want to know all about her! If they’re not, and/or she isn’t interested, then I’m happy to walk away and leave it at that. My point is, I like having these feelings for a woman again… fancying a woman…. finding her attractive….being curious about who she is, where she comes from and if she prefers the morning or the night.
    While there might always be a place for sensual, flirtatious, sexual emails and texts, I think in the 1st instance I physically need to converse with her and ask her out! Not ask her for her bbbbbbbbbbbbb thingamabob!

    • TheSingleFilez March 5, 2011 at 1:27 PM #

      Hi John, thanks for reading! And thanks for breaking the record for my longest ever comment 🙂

      You’re right. Ask her out. You’ll never know how she feels otherwise. If she likes you, definitely get to know her a bit before resorting purely to technology to communicate. Good luck!

  5. MoneyMaus March 2, 2011 at 11:51 PM #

    AGREE with you & all the above comments! Even when I had a Blackberry, no guy ever asked me for my pin & I’m so glad! At least ask for the phone number, call a handful of times then revert to texting or whatever. That guy is an idiot and clearly not looking for a relationship. YF? Gross. No way. I really hope girls don’t go for that crap!

    • TheSingleFilez March 5, 2011 at 12:03 PM #

      Exactly. Make the effort to call/speak on the phone first. Don’t go for the BB pin straight away. As for the ‘YF’ thing, I did have to wonder if it’s actually ever worked for him? I mean, cringe or what?!

  6. Little Miss Random March 3, 2011 at 7:32 AM #

    Asking for a BB PIN is not acceptable! It’s downright lazy. I have actually busted someone’s chops for asking me out over a text or Facebook, though not in a totally mean way, I admit. I associate my BB with work, even if I use one for personal use, and, honestly, picking up the phone to someone – or even texting, if they must – is not that hard!

    And… “Your Future”? Geez. Who *does* that sort of thing?

    • TheSingleFilez March 5, 2011 at 12:05 PM #

      I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks this. I mentioned this story to a friend the other day, and she said she didn’t think the BB pin approach was that bad. Knowing others feel the same way I do helps me realise I’m not so unreasonable after all. Hooray!

  7. somethingshedated April 24, 2011 at 8:37 PM #

    OMG no you’re so in the right!!! You are not old school…the dude is a douche…seriously!! Plus cheeky bastard is right trying to make you feel like you were over-reacting or something…bleh! Glad you escaped his grasp lol!

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