I Am Not Interested

2 Feb

I’d been planning  to blog about last weekend’s date with the guy I met at the Lovestruck London Laissez-Faire party, but to be honest, the date really wasn’t anything special and I’ve been struggling to find a way to make it into an interesting and entertaining blog post. So, instead I thought I’d share an annoying amusing exchange that I recently had with an unwanted suitor on POF.

Ok, to set the scene, please do remember that as previously mentioned, the messages received on PlentyOf Fish.com are all kinds of shady and 85% of them are to be ignored. I know that my fellow POF users will know exactly what I’m talking about…

Guy, 24th January
“Hi gorgeous,hw re u doin,hope u alrite?.I must confess,u re in did a pretty lady…U thrilled me wit ur beauty and it calls 4 an invitation and would lyke 2 honour it.[hahahahahahah].holla bac…HAPPY NEW YEAR”

Guy, 27th January
“Hi pretty,u re looking absolutely stunning and lavishing..u alrite thou?”

Guy, 1st February (1am)
“Hi gorgeous,you look amazing,am actually thrilled your beauty and i fink you deserve a toast..cheers..lol”

Guy, 1st February (2pm)
“Hi gorgeous,you look amazing,am actually thrilled your beauty and i fink you deserve a toast..cheers..lol”

As you can imagine, by this point I’m going slightly loopy and I realise I HAVE to say something.

Me, 1st February
“Hi there, you keep sending me the same message over and over again, could you please stop?  Thank you.”

Guy, 1st February
“maybe is probably because wherent reponding that’s why…so doest it mean that you dont wanna chatt? or perhaps get to knw our selves better?”

Me, 1st February
“If I message someone and they don’t reply I assume that they aren’t interested. It happens all of the time and I definitely wouldn’t want to annoy them by sending them the same message over and over again.”

Guy, 1st February
“so what are you insinuating?,in actually sence?”

Me, 1st February
“I’m not ‘insinuating’ anything. I’m just saying that if I message someone on here and they ignore me, I assume they aren’t interested. And if they aren’t interested, then sending the same message over and over again wouldn’t help or change that fact.”

Guy, 1st February
“so do i assume that your explanations could be that you are not interested?”

Me, 1st February

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I should’ve  put the poor guy out of his misery and replied with a straightforward “I AM NOT INTERESTED”, right? But seriously, he frustrated me. Not only did I find dude’s writing skills to be hugely offensive but, as horrible as it may sound (and it is horrible), it’s a well-known online dating fact that if someone ignores your message, they aren’t interested in talking to you. You accept it, you take it on the chin, and then you move on.

How about you? Do you respond to every single cringe-inducing message you receive on a dating website? How do you let someone know you aren’t interested? Reply, ignore, delete or block?


17 Responses to “I Am Not Interested”

  1. Sparky February 2, 2011 at 3:15 PM #

    Ha ha that made me laugh, I get them ALL the time (and on match.com too!), I’ve ended up blocking some guys as they keep emailing saying ‘don’t be shy’ .. I’m not shy I’m not interested!! Such a turn off the ‘text’ speak writing, even if they looked like Brad Pitt I’d run a mile if they type like that. One guy who kept mailing me, here’s what he wrote on his profile:

    “hi looking 4 hoooooot women

    hi evry body im looking for friend to have nice time.to go out to trvel out side uk.i need really injoy the time the life to short .for me i dont mind the girle from where i just looking for the personeltey.i like cars”

    I wonder if there’s women’s profiles like this?!

    • TheSingleFilez February 4, 2011 at 11:19 AM #

      Haha, it’s terrible right? I’m so glad you agree.

      As for the message you received. I mean, really? I’m honestly hoping that English isn’t that guys first language!

  2. Cat February 2, 2011 at 8:24 PM #

    This cracked me up so much I had to read it out loud to my friend. So much stupid I can’t even handle it. I have to say though, you are a trooper for actually responding so politely. I probably would have tossed out a couple four letter words and told him where to go.

    • TheSingleFilez February 4, 2011 at 9:49 PM #

      Haha! And to think that I was expecting comments telling me I was being mean for not spelling it out clearly for him.

  3. John Boy February 2, 2011 at 8:32 PM #

    Classic. Spelling so bad that it’s good.

    Guys don’t have this problem. I do the vast majority of the approach work in my innings of the boy-girl game.

    • TheSingleFilez February 4, 2011 at 9:50 PM #

      Guys don’t have this problem, as in, women are better at putting together a sentence?

  4. Trace February 4, 2011 at 3:27 PM #

    Loved this blog post! Persistant guys on POF are a personal pet hate of mine, one of these days I swear I’ll get one that’ll tip me over the edge and they’ll feel the real wrath!

    I, like youself, firmly believe that if you send someone a message and they don’t respond that its a No. They’ve had a look at your profile, they don’t feel a need to take it any further and its the end of the matter. A few months ago, I too had a persistant little ‘fish’.

    He had sent me several messages (both very similar, like the ones you had experienced) neither of which were overly inspiring so I didn’t respond. A few days later, he took it upon himself to email me his disgust that I hadn’t replied. He informed me it was really rude and that I was being stuck up. I politely responded advising him of the following:

    I’m sorry you seem to be offended by the lack of response, but unfortunately this is par for the course with online dating. As you seem so keen to solicit a response from me, it’s simple I AM NOT INTERESTED AND NEVER WILL BE. Hows that for stuck up?’

    Maybe that was mean of me but seriously guys, ‘personality fail, no response email’ simple as.

    • TheSingleFilez February 4, 2011 at 9:53 PM #

      OMG, that made me actually, properly laugh out loud!! I love it Tracey. Bloody brilliant! I may have to use that sometime in the future.

      Thanks for commenting 🙂

  5. Harriet Bond February 5, 2011 at 12:02 PM #

    One of my pet hates on these dating sites is bad spelling and grammar… call me a snob, but I am just not interested in someone who can’t even be bothered to check a dictionary. How sloppy will his behaviour be if his writing is this bad? Maybe I am a snob, but I am learning to have plenty of boundaries and high standards. Ok I may be single for longer, but as my mother says, ‘buy cheap, buy twice’!

    • TheSingleFilez February 5, 2011 at 1:53 PM #

      I know, right? I think dating websites have made me pickier. Before they existed, back when I only met guys in social situations, I had no idea what their spelling and grammar was like. For all I know, the favourite guys from my past may have written like complete idiots – except I never saw it!

      Your Mother is a wise woman 😉

  6. Martha February 7, 2011 at 12:32 PM #

    I literally laughed out loud when I got to the “Headdesk” photo. I have had some similar experiences on a few different dating sites. You shouldn’t have to spell it out, it’s definitely common knowledge that if you don’t respond you’re not interested! I often sign up feeling quite excited but then once the winks start coming from 45 year olds (I’m 28) I start to regret it immediately. I tried the Laissez Faire thing a couple weeks ago as well and found it to be fun. But seemed like many were there just for a hook up…what did you think?

    • TheSingleFilez February 7, 2011 at 8:36 PM #

      I feel your pain Martha. Something about these dating sites make (way) older men think they have a chance. I’ve had messages from a 56 year old – the same age as my Father, yuk!

      Sounds like we were probably at the same Laissez Faire event? I didn’t speak to too many guys there to be honest, we were too busy people-watching 😉

  7. Mary February 7, 2011 at 3:05 PM #

    I think he sounded like a really eloquent, interesting guy… I can’t believe you didn’t give him a chance!!!

  8. Wendi B February 9, 2011 at 11:06 PM #

    Oh my gosh!!! I found myself swearing aloud as I read that – and I don’t really swear!! That was painful! (But hilarious…)

  9. somethingshedated April 24, 2011 at 8:04 PM #

    I’ve got an ENTIRE post coming up about it (lol) so I won’t get too detailed here but I block…right away…after the first message. *more coming soon* lol

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: