7 Sep


  1. a concluding part added to a literary work, as a novel.
  2. a speech, usually in verse, delivered by one of the actors after the conclusion of a play.

Following on from my ‘The One I Thought Could Be ‘The One’ trilogy (Part one here, part two here and part three, here). Here’s the real concluding part to the story. It took me awhile to get over the whole episode but I managed to stay strong. I emailed/called/text him a few times but after getting no response I drummed it into my head that for whatever reason he really was no longer interested. I didn’t hound him. I’m too proud a person to do that. Didn’t mean I didn’t think about him all the time though. I reminisced about the fun times we had but I never contacted him…. until one night seven months later.

One night the following summer I came home a little drunk (and a lot emotional) after a night out with friends. I was home alone crying my little heart out asking myself over and over again “why does no-one want me?” (Alcohol is so damn mean sometimes). This resulted in me digging out The Potential One’s number and sending him a text – and to think I had deleted it from my phone to avoid moments just like that one, ha!

I wanted to know what happened for him to go from being so enthuasiastic about me, to absolutely nothing. Seven months had past, I wanted an explanation. I deserved an explanation. I pressed ‘send’ and literally 30 seconds later my phone started ringing. I jumped. Wasn’t expecting that. It was one in the morning. I thought he’d be sleeping, I thought he’d ignore it. But no, there he was… calling me.

It was weird to hear his voice. He acted like nothing had ever happened “Hi Babe, how have you beeeeeen?”. We ended up speaking, laughing and sharing memories for over 30 minutes on the phone before he invited himself over. I was drunk, I was emotional, I said yes. It had been seven months since we’d last spoken and eight months since we’d last seen eachother and there he was, whizzing across London in a taxi  to my place at nearly 2am on a weeknight. Arrggh, what the hell was I doing?

I was nervous. I was excited. What did it mean? Was he still interested in me? He arrived and as per usual, he looked like the extreme thing of hotness that he is. I melted. Everything I wanted to say, everything I wanted to ask… it all went out of the window. There was lots of general ‘what have you been up to’ chit chat but none of us brought up the past. None of us spoke about what went wrong. Instead…. we got “busy”.  Oh yes, we got busy and we knocked boots all night long.  (FYI, that’s actually the ‘last time’ I referred to in my previous post “Can I Call Myself Celibate Now?” ).

He stayed the night. He wanted me to call into work sick and stay home all day. At the time I stupidly thought it meant he wanted to spent more time with me. Now, I think he was just loving the idea of a day of easy sex on tap. I decided to go into work (I’m a dedicated employee like that ;-)). We got ready and left my flat together. All sweetness and light on a sunny summer morning. We said goodbye, all hugs and kisses. I text him that evening to say it had been lovely to see him.

That was summer 2009. I’ve not heard from him since. I felt okay about it this time though. This time I wasn’t wrapped up in the dreamy, romantic Barcelona/Marrakech memories. This time I was able to look at him for what he really is – A BIG FAT HUMONGOUS (but hot) DOUCHEBAG.

13 Responses to “Epilogue”

  1. @MissMegasaurus September 7, 2010 at 2:17 PM #

    Amen girlfriend! I think we all need that “one last time” with someone who made such an impact on our life. We’re so blinded by the rosey glasses that are placed upon our beautiful faces in those first few weeks/months of a relationship that we see the GOOD in people and not the faults. We don’t realize why they are gone and why we are better for it until they come back one last time and show their true colors. It was fun, a learning experience and one you can refer back to when you wonder why your such a strong, independent single gal …. see ya later bag of douche and on to the next!

  2. Miss City Girl September 7, 2010 at 4:42 PM #

    I just read the whole story. Thanks for the afternoon contemplation.

    It seems so many men just don’t realise how we get hung up on them. Take my latest situation on my blog. We played cat and mouse since march and it took him to see me out and about having the time of my life with people he works with to realise that I’m a person and deserve an apology. Total wanker.

    • TheSingleFilez September 7, 2010 at 10:54 PM #

      @Meg – Your comment hit the nail on the head so much it’s *actually* scary!

      @MissCityGirl – Welcome, thanks for reading. I need to have a read of your blog to get up to speed 🙂

  3. Dragonessa Fiore September 9, 2010 at 12:00 AM #

    Damness!!! Okay, yeah Im not saying a sad wow anymore LoL! Totally agreed that it was a nice bit of closure you got there… Hes all shades of douchebag.

    Awe! The series is over now…write another!!! 😀

    • TheSingleFilez September 9, 2010 at 10:35 AM #

      I know, right? This was what it took for me to not be sad about him anymore too. It knocked some sense right in me.

      After that episode, right away I was like “NEXT!”

  4. Skye Blue September 10, 2010 at 7:40 PM #

    That so wasn’t the ending I was expecting. I’m pretty much at a loss for words.

    Anyway, I’m glad you’re over it. That man puts a very large capital ‘T’ in the word Trifling.

    • TheSingleFilez September 11, 2010 at 6:04 PM #

      Trifling, YES!

  5. Charlene Odetola December 19, 2010 at 3:17 AM #

    WHY DO GUYS DO THIS?????????????
    I’m sorry but this is beyond a joke, your ‘relationship’ with this guy was going well, if he had a problem, why didn’t he say SOMETHING!
    This just gets me so angry when guys decide to do these things for no apparent reason.
    You are soooooo much better off without him, who needs that kinda pain….

    • TheSingleFilez December 19, 2010 at 11:12 AM #

      I know, right? It’s not like we’d only gone out on a couple of dates… we’d been on holiday together, TWICE! We used to see eachother 2-3 times a week. I think that means I deserved some type of explanation. Ah well, at least the last hook up gave me some sort of closure 😦

  6. IceQueen April 4, 2011 at 11:41 AM #

    What a wanker…I agree with Charlene why didn’t he speak his mind men are such cowards sometimes. He owed you an explanation you were not in a fly by night type of thing you had invested a lot of time and emotions in to the situation. Plus the fact he had met friends, family etc and vice versa.

    Everytime I hear the phrase “men are simple creatures” I groan inwardly because they aren’t. They are complicated and calculated as the us women if not more so.

    • TheSingleFilez April 4, 2011 at 10:56 PM #

      I don’t think I will ever be able to figure this one out. Like you said, it wasn’t a fly by night type of thing. We talked enough and we shared enough for me to expect a decent explanation.

      Men are most definitely NOT simple creatures… *sigh*

  7. fightcancerwithfood July 17, 2011 at 1:07 PM #

    Just came across this story, and this exact same situation just happened to me! Had an amazing few months together, then a completely unexplained disappearance from my life, then one 24 hour reappearance… then zilch. How can guys be so convincing with the whole, ooh it’s been so good to see you again, we’ll do this.. we’ll go here… you’re amazing blahblahblah… AND THEN NOTHING?! It. makes. no. sense.


    Just wanted to say that I totally hear you. Douchebag.

    • TheSingleFilez July 17, 2011 at 2:17 PM #

      Wow, totally similar!

      It just doesn’t make any sense, does it? Why bother come back that one last time? Why not just say what the problem is, instead of disappearing off the face of the earth? How can you get along with someone so well for months on end, spend time with them, share things with them and then not think they deserve some sort of explanation as to why you’re making a sharp exit?


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